Wisdom from Mel Robbins: The 5 Second Rule for Writers
Photo by Veri Ivanova on Unsplash
To be clear right off the bat, Mel did not specifically talk about her 5-Second Rule, or anything else, in terms of writers. But in rereading her book, The 5-Second Rule, I realized that a lot of what she says can be especially helpful for writers and other creatives in getting out of their own way and making progress toward their goals.
For those who don’t know, the 5 Second Rule is simply this: when you’re feeling draggy about doing something, you count down from 5, and then do the thing. Don’t feel like getting out of bed? 5-4-3-2-1 and get up. Don’t feel like writing? 5-4-3-2-1 and open up the document.
The 5 Second Rule accepts no excuses. It’s short and focused, and cuts through all the chatter in your brain that tells you the story of why you really don’t want to do the thing. In writing, some of these stories might be: I’m tired. I should do X instead. Or maybe I’ll do it tomorrow... With the 5-Second Rule, you don’t indulge the story. You just write. It trains your brain in a very real way that those stories are jsut thoughts passing through, and you take action in spite of them.
Other gems for writers from her book:
You need to parent yourself – In other words, you need to stop waiting for someone to tell you what do you, and when to do it. You need to stop waiting for permission to write. We’ve all heard about our Inner Child. Now we have to activate the Inner Parent, a loving but firm presence that encourages us and keeps their eye on the larger picture. Our Inner Child wants to eat ice cream for dinner and play instead of cleaning their room. Our Inner Adult knows that sometimes you have push yourself to do the thing you don’t want to do in the moment, in order to reap the reward later on.
Why Motivation Is a Myth – You will rarely FEEL like writing, because it’s scary. You need to push yourself to do it and that’s ok. Our complicated brains default to “easy” to save energy and save us from fear of negative consequences. We need to override that with some good old prefrontal cortex decision-making to move forward. The problem isn’t writing, it’s your feeling about writing. The 5 Second Rule helps override that feeling so you can just act. You need to learn to say “so what?” to fear. The thing you fear (rejection, failure, success, other people’s opinions) won’t kill you but failing to act will make you feel like you’re dying slowly. You need the courage to start, and the discipline to keep going. Which also means 5-4-3-2-1 to overcome your fears every time they crop up.
Simply by writing down your goals, you are 42% more likely to achieve them – Mel cites research by Gail Matthews on this. Don’t just write down your BHAG (Big Hairy-Ass Goal) once and then forget it. Break it down into the Big Goal (publishing a book) and then the goals you need to take each month, each week, each day to reach it. I break it down and set a schedule weekly, and then daily, so every day I see what I want to accomplish that day.
Mel also recommends asking yourself: What are the 2-3 daily things that will help move me forward on my goals? Start your day by defining them, put them in your calendar. Prioritize working on them before anything else, if at all possible. This can include writing, researching agents, learning marketing or self-publishing… get in the habit of doing something towards your writing goal.
She also cites Parkinson’s Law – work expands to fill whatever time you give it. This means that whatever time you have, you can use it – and more time doesn’t always equal more accomplished. We’ve probably all experienced days where we only had one or two things to do – and found ourselves at the end of the day racing to get them done, wondering where the day went. If you have three hours to write, it’s easy to waste the first hour (or more) on distractions. Time constraints are your friend. You focus quicker when you know you have less time, and often end up getting more done.
“Have you tried switching it off, then on again?” – Sometimes a 5-second or 5-minute break can help when you’re stuck. If you find yourself doing unproductive daydreaming, or tempted to check email, say 5-4-3-2-1 to yourself and re-focus. Or if you really need a longer break, take five minutes to stretch or walk around a bit. Take a few deep centering breaths. This will recalibrate your mind and body so you can settle back down to the work.
The 5 Second Rule is a simple way to hack your brain, help you cut through the urge to procrastinate, and stay focused while writing. The biggest challenge is remembering to do it! Once it becomes a habit, it will become much easier.
Have you tried it? If so, has it helped? If you haven’t, I encourage you to try it. It’s one of those things that seems so simple you think it couldn’t possibly work. But all you are doing is rewiring your brain. It takes time for those neural pathways to become established, and when they do, the practice becomes a tremendous support for your writing – or anything else you apply it to.
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